May
27 2009
Oops! A little late with the book club discussion this month which is more of a reflection on how quickly May flew by than our book choice. Because I actually really loved the book, Everyone is Beautiful by Katherine Center. Except for how it left me a mess of tears at the end. I’m such a sap.
But on to our discussion! Here are some questions and general ideas that came to us while reading that we hope will generate some discussion. As always, don’t feel like you have to stick to these, bring up anything you wish to discuss as well!
- The author often uses foreshadowing at the end of chapters. Would you have preferred it without the foreshadowing or do you feel that it added to your interest in the story?
- Despite the fairly serious tone of the book, there were many laugh-out-loud moments throughout the story. What were some of your favorite funny moments?
- Why do you think the author chose to tell the story from Lanie’s point of view? Do you think it changed how we, the readers, viewed the actions of others in the book and our opinions of the characters as we met them? As an example, at times Peter seems harsh in his reactions to Lanie’s requests for more time or assistance, do you feel that he was justified in his behaviour or is this a skewed view because we’re only seeing things from Lanie’s perspective?
- Along those same lines, Lanie makes a lot of quick judgements about people based on her first impression/interaction with them (including Cambridge itself) only to slowly change her opinion as she grew to know them better. Do you think that’s a reflection of the title of the book and the truth to finding the beauty in everyone? Do you think the way Lanie makes friends with these people she initially doesn’t like is an accurate representation of how we make friends in real life?
- We meet a multitude of women in the book who are struggling to juggle being a wife, being a mother, and being their own person. Do you think there’s a message or something to be learned from each of the various situations we encounter?
- Dreams. Almost everyone in this book talks about something they thought they wanted or something they still want to do with their lives. Is there something you’ve always dreamed about and/or wanted to do with your life? How important do you think it is to hold on to your dreams even as other things in your life change?
Before I get into the discussions, I just want to say once again that I loved this book. I wasn’t really expecting to since it’s not something I’d typically pick up in the store. So I was surprised by how much I was drawn into the story. Every person I’ve seen since I finished it this past weekend has heard me talk about it. So, good pick Jody!
Yay! I’m so glad you enjoyed it… I wasn’t 100% sure when I suggested it. She has a gift for creating characters that seem completely real.
Everyone should check out The Bright Side of Disaster if you enjoyed it. (I know you already did Rae!)
She definitely does! I could see my family and friends in the story. As you’ve said in our email exchanges, it felt like we were actually reading a true story rather than fiction.
Also, whenever I write to Jody about book club books, I always end up writing more discussion than questions so I’m gonna copy some of those here. They apply to the questions above but kind of expand on why I wanted to get the question out there!
First up… I’d like to get opinions on whether Peter was justified in his reaction to what happened. Or whether anyone else felt like Lanie was the one who had to keep making concessions during the book so that, while I was happy that they reconciled in the end, I still didn’t feel like they were really on equal footing. Or, more accurately, that Peter ever acknowledged his role in what happened. That said, we are getting a pretty one-sided look at things since we are relying on Lanie’s POV and we don’t get the story about how she and Peter ended up together until the end. Because at least he was honest about his nature from the start (though saying you’re the type to get so wrapped up in your music only prepares the other person for that behavior, it shouldn’t excuse it).
I think the fact that Lanie now has her own obsessive interest with the photography, helps put them on equal ground. As well as the fact that all Peter’s song titles clearly indicate that he appreciates Lanie and all the many things she does for their family.
I do agree that he doesn’t do a great job of showing it, and if we hadn’t have gotten that glimpse into his thoughts with the song titles, it would have seemed that he was very detached from the relationship.
As far as his reaction to the kissing. I understood his immediate reaction – he thought they were having an affair, so I felt he was justifiably upset. BUT he was not justified in taking off and not talking to her. He should have at least listened to Lanie and found out what was really going on before taking off like that.
Oh, yes, the song titles and even the way they ended up together showed us a lot more about Peter’s feelings. Although I think his reaction to her question about why he wouldn’t sleep with someone was also telling. There were lots of little ways we saw that he loved her (the small gift of chocolate bars, etc.) But they kind of got lost because it was told from her POV and how she wasn’t impressed with those things as she may have been once. Or because of how much the other things in her life were getting her down overshadowed those things… and he did seem oblivious to how much the move was bothering her.
Of course, later she’s also pretty oblivious to how what she’s doing is affecting him. Another realistic view of marriage. How even when you get along and do love each other, things can get off track so easily and unintentionly and the longer they stay that way the harder it is to get them back on track. (You know, like going along with someone thinking you’re pregnant just because it’s easier than dealing with the momentary humiliation of admitting you’re not. Only then things snowball and end up affecting you in ways you didn’t expect.)
Oh and I agree he was justified in getting upset. It was the the leaving like he did and not calling (tho, of course, he did try to call) and the way he warned her not to screw this opportunity up for him… that stuff bugged me. But she did show us that he had an extreme reaction to Josh seeing her naked too and clearly he’s a passionate guy when it’s something he loves (his music, for example) so I suppose it fit his character. It just bugged me a little that she forgave it so easily I guess. Not that we get much time with them after that moment and I’m sure it had lasting effect on their marriage beyond the end of the book as we see it.
(Sorry I’m late) – I agree that Peter was a justified in being upset, maybe not with Lanie, but at what he witnessed. If he had given her a chance to explain, or didn’t fly off the handle, demanding not to speak with her for two weeks (and at Christmastime), there would be a whole different ending.
If there was a book from Peter’s point of view, I would imagine we’d hear more of inner most thoughts. Probably those about how he wishes he could spend time with his kids, as much as Lanie could, and how he did appreciate her. I think it was simply an effect of storytelling that their relationship came off sounding uneven or more effort on her part. The chocolate bars, the fact that he ate beets for her, the fact that he put her in every title – I mean, there was more feeling there than the narrator would lead you to believe.
I wonder if we would have seen that Peter was actually trying to get her to stop worrying about her looks with the chocolate bars, etc. He does give in and try the food she wants before he says he can’t do it so maybe he was trying to use the sweets to prove to her that he didn’t care how she looked.
Not that it really matters, obviously it would have been a story from his perspective… that was just a thought that came to me while I was reading Amrie’s comment.
Damn! That was really the only one I had. But I did comment to her that it’s kind of funny none of us are mothers (who usually post — if you’re joining us this first time and are a mother, don’t think I’m excluding you!) so we can’t really get into a discussion about how having kids and being a mother can become an all consuming task and leave you feeling like you don’t get to be *you* anymore… Although I’m not entirely convinced Lanie had a firm sense of self even before she got pregnant. About the only conviction I felt from her about that time of her life was that she wanted to live in Houston and it becomes clear that was more about being close to her family more than anything else.
I don’t have kids (as you mentioned), but I do remember my sister in law saying she felt like a milk cow when she was nursing her 2nd son. The comment is something that’s always stuck with me, and the beginning of the book reminded me of it a few times.
Lanie reminded me a lot of Mo in the way that Mo loves HP but also has those moments when she just wants some time to herself. Especially when we’d see how that even tho she was getting some adult time at the playground, her attention always has to be on what’s going on with the kids. It’s an exhausting job, being a mom.
Plus, I had to laugh when she found them making a mess in the bathroom and just shut the door and let them have their fun if it gave her a few minutes of peace. Mostly because I had just talked to my sister on the phone and, about halfway through our convo, her son decided he was done being in the bath. She was really bummed because for that brief time she had been enjoying actually being able to talk to me without him around. Not because she doesn’t love him or could no longer talk to me, just that it meant she’d now have to let her attention be divided and she was happy to have had that brief time to “herself.”
Foreshadowing – I wasn’t really a fan of the foreshadowing. I found it changed my expectations while reading the book. Instead of just enjoying the story as it unfolded, I kept waiting for the husband to leave. So I always had thoughts like “oh, this must be where the marriage falls apart” as I went along. And then when they did actually have their blow-out I was a bit let down because the foreshadowing was somewhat exaggerated.
Not that I wanted them to have a bigger problem or anything (I was very happy they worked it out), but after hinting that the marriage was going to fall apart, having a 2 week fight doesn’t really stand up.
You know, I actually didn’t mind it. I do agree that Lanie’s initial comment about their marriage did make it seem like a bigger deal than it was… Err, not that it wasn’t a big deal, but something about the way it’s first hinted at made it seem like she was going to have to make a bigger decision than I felt she did in the end. More because what happened really was a misunderstanding so it was less about either of them having to pick a side so much as clear up what happened. I actually thought maybe she was going to come to really resent him or something, something that she’d be forced to overcome in order to reconcile with him.
But in general I don’t mind the foreshadowing. It’s been used in a couple of books I’ve read in the past few months and I think it’s just a different way to approach the story and one that I feel kinda makes sense when you’re telling the story from the first person POV. Because naturally I know when something in a story I’m telling is actually a significant moment even if you, my audience, don’t realize it yet. In that way, I find it interesting to note where the foreshadowing takes place and whether I think it’s really where things started to change, ya know?
Other than the major foreshadowing in the beginning, I didn’t have too much of a problem with it. I do think that the initial almost “and then it all went to hell” type of foreshadowing about the marriage kept me like, looking for signs that Lanie was going to have an affair, or that Peter was going to announce he was leaving, because I expected it to be a bit worse than it (thankfully) turned out to be.
So, Jody, I have a question… now that I’ve read Katherine Center’s other book, I see she also did lots of foreshadowing in that one too. Did it bother you as much in that one as it did here?
Humour – I laughed pretty hard a few times in this book! One of the ones that still stands out is “Mommy, what does fuck the pasta mean?”
As well as “Mommy, you’re pudgier than ever” (or something along those lines).
I guess that’s one definite bonus of having kids in your story… they can be pretty funny.
I knew it was coming but I laughed the most at the kids seeing Nora on the stairs and referring to her as The Mean Witch loud enough that she heard and Lanie trying to pretend it was from a story. Plus, Nora’s solution to the kids thinking she’s an actual witch made me laugh too.
I can’t remember other specific moments right now but there were several times the kid stuff made me snort out loud.
Oh, and it was plumper. I loved that the kid was basically subsituting ‘plump’ for beautiful or pretty. And naturally Lanie didn’t get that right away because she was feeling heavy but it became obvious to her later.
I really like the humor – I didn’t laugh out loud a whole lot, but the book was terrifically charming, and did keep me smiling the whole time. Even through the troubling times, because she was witty.
Anything her kids did – like when the youngest jumped on the friend’s bed for a long time, with the crap on his foot? So funny.
This is true. She had a dry wit that I loved. Especially when it came out while she was in the middle of a difficult situation. But I guess that’s the only way you could survive things like that… if you didn’t have a sense of humor life would be pretty rough.
The one thing that bugged me and it wasn’t really the author’s fault so much as bad timing. Literally the book I read the day before this one did the mal-functioning cell phone thing and missing phone calls/it not ringing too. As soon as Lanie’s mom made some comment about not being able to get through on the phone, I suspected that was why she hadn’t heard from Peter.
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